question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
