i can't believe i had my finger in that
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
