Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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