Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
