Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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