Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
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He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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