Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
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i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
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I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.