we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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