meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize