I think i sorta joined a cult last night
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
