The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
