Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
