Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
