I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
We had to coat check the pizza.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
