Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
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