i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I would fuck him just for his dog
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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