Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
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