You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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