I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
