I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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