There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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