She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
