we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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