when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
