That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize