i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I could fuck to npr.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize