But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
