i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't watch enough power rangers
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize