Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
