Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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