They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
