You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Damn victory sex feels great
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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