loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
