new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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