If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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