dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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