i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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