like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
