dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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