It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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