At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
