I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
