Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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