and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize