She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
