just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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