We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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