I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
