im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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