Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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