How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
