so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
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We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
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You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
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